Freedom from the pain. Lesson 2. Zoya Yankovskaya

on the last lesson we discovered the behavior of atomic energy because it was very important for us to find a close parallelism in order to learn the behavior of our feelings, emotions. This is honestly very similar because our feelings are also created by tiny pieces and behave in similar, very similar ways, of identical ways in their physical components. When energy is compressed and heated, it behaves like gas like item, like an explosion. Yes? And our feelings behaves in the same way because in this same sense this gas like item that we simply do not see with our five senses.
Now there are devices, they’re been around for a long time, great devices that register our feelings, what and how those feelings that behave when you are focused on a specific focus in a device. And, now, this doesn't like any type of mystic or wisdom anymore. 

Well, how can infinity be compressed? If a creation comes into, well, this divine creation comes incarnates into the body, how can it be limited by anything? After all, this infinity, when this infinite is emitted by the body. Yes? And everything that happens to a person in his life—conceptual mind, system, which it is all tied to the need to limit, guarantee, judge, compare, take into verdict; it’s all methods of cutting the infinite soul in this some kind of limitation primitive form.
And as a result of this, what happens is what happens. The person explores, literally explodes. Even if in the outer he is not exploding, he is exploding  inside. And all of those diseases that are considered incurable, those that medicine today, simply, raises its hands and says, “We don’t know what to do.” Yes? In this amount of growing cancer, yes, in this young growth of cancer, and all the like.
And it all happens because that the atomic energy as impersonation of feelings person it’s compressed and later in the years, pours into dependencies of narcotics-alcoholism, diseases, and other damaged different models that project violence of the behaviors toward oneself. Yes? A person projects violence toward himself, into the world, toward behaviors on its children, and that is inherited by generations like a relay race, because he has no idea what else to do because his whole life, he was taught to pressure oneself and pressure others, in turn using ways of manipulation, ways of pressure of feeling quilt. Certainly this is layered that is very important in all manipulative models of person.
A child comes into a system that tells him, “can’t have that,” “can’t have this,” “you’re supposed to,” “you’re required to.” So at the start, he comes into this beautiful flower that loves everything and everyone. Yes? When a child comes, he smiles to everyone he sees, but gradually, he learns not to smile, but be guarded and be more afraid, and then hate.
And all of that happens in result that he was taught how it was supposed to be and how it should be, what is wrong, and what you are expected in life by everyone.
When we know that there is no duality, no parallel theories, we can easily understand our children, we can understand ourselves. In this way, we can know how to build our engagements—how to see the soul of a person of pure love through that person’s behavior models, through his disobedience, to see his request to be loved. And in response, not strengthening that pressure of that particular atomic energy of feelings, but see in what ways the energy wants to blossom. In that way, we can additionally see in the paths to gift him the best resources to situations so that he can blossom in his indefinite, limitless potential ways in which he came into this world with these things in order to gift others.

But before he can see how to give that to our children, it’s crucial to do that with oneself, because, our ways of thinking is set on to judge, compare, take into verdict, and for that in that feeling of guilt and manipulate ourselves and the world. We, in those behaviors of ourselves, constantly produce these very damaging and broken templates in which we have nothing to give to our children.
And talk about some new level of knowledge, about some quantum jump, it’s all shaking up the air because it’s comparable to worthless pathos that will not give anyone anything until we ourselves go through this important work of the resewing through this damaged behavior, damaged teachings, paradigm that in itself reproduce themselves.
Well, folks we have come to a tight to the moment when it’s necessary to visually figure out what are polarities, dualism from which that damage and break is born from that person’s life. A child comes into the world deeply lovingly, happy, and shining consciousness because its own universal consciousness it that state of being of this dancing, smiling happiness, that I would say.
And when that child comes into by this state, lovingly happiness, he does not know what is plus, what is minus, yes, and doesn’t know that he is able to judge someone as a good person, as a bad person. He just loves and everyone who gets into this visual perspective, and in turn the child is possessed with compression shackles, in the space that he is in that platform that teaches him to be ashamed, afraid, judge, or, judge, like good and bad, what is right and wrong, how superiority and inferiority.
So, when the parent repeats over and over, say this is bad and this is good, “Little Son Came to Father and Little Son Asked,” these are poems are actually monstrous. If you really think about what is good and bad. So what is so bad when the child comes into this happiness trying to love the world, and the bad that happens is that creates the guilt for the mother that needs on every step, protect the child. Yes, so that the little inventor doesn’t get harmed, does not doomed child’s death, its own vulnerable body. And in that way, everything becomes bad in the way what calls the child to investigate the world.
Over time, the child also puts into the system from daycare, when there is a forth going of the telling that these strangers that this is bad, you can’t go there. So when you go into the ground of some kind of that for you, particular, space, behind the line, for your particular emotions that amplitude the voice that it becomes bad, indecently, ashamed, well, well, well, and all of that compressed of course, of the emotions of guilt.
Like, how to make a person ashamed of itself? You have to say that for everyone is ashamed, that he is bad on a high level that everyone is trying to keep distant from him and in that way, layers in from the early, early, start of age, from newborn age, installation that he has a reason to be ashamed. This, this happens on such very tiny relations when there is not evidently demonstrates how this looks like truthful blackmail. This is in all minor occurrences. If you are not finished eating your meal, you will be like this and are disobeying me, then I will abdicate, and will not love you, like in other words like, mom will not love you because … This always happens.
And in absolutely in daycare, the child, strange child and there is a lot of then and this unwanted obligation for teachers, who are always going into somewhere and looming, like scattering kids, they are every nervous and annoyed. Yes? And the main message from the notion that you are supposed to be guilty that you exist and that you are a source of irritation. The child will soak in that immediately from the start of life this fear of the actions done and be punished or be rejected, or that and this.
Of course, this becomes already inside of him, he’s already formed in this total feeling of guilt. The feeling of guilt is the feeling of self-denial. So, self-denial is compressed as is in itself, how is it, well, in reality self-hate is in itself. Yes? If you are calling everything by your own words.
And then what happens when the child is told he is bad? He falls into a trap. He falls into a trap of constantly devaluating himself, and the belief that this it’s not right. So, since everything that has come from this great infinite, it is lowered into expectations of those primitive insights that you, you are not neutral, you are not, you are not just you, yes? From which a person comes into it, I am present. Yes?
You may be bad or good, only that and nothing else. That’s it. You can be compared to others, you need to be compared with others to be relatively in a state of judgement, yes? And that way, you are put into pedestal of verdict and judgment.
So you are not just existing, you are not just you the way you are irreplaceable; there is no other like you in the world. And another who exists and is also infinite, and irreplaceable. No! No one will say that to a child. A child will be taught the idea that if he is going to be bad and judged like a bad, then he will be turned away and unlovable. Then in turn, what does he need to do? He falls right into a trap that shows the world that I am, please, I will, cringe and do something that will be, for God’s sake, by all means don’t reject me. For God’s sake, do not push me away, do not stop loving me, upon all heaven I will not live through all that.
A person begins to, a child begins to plea when he is devalued even further, and that he is worse and what kind of a bad boy you are. Oh God, and that rocks even more in comparison to, “Oh God, how scary, how scary, how I am punished, how I am deeply guilty, I guilty in everything.” And the child cannot filter through it all from this level of consciousness; he forgotten how he came into this world.
And he starts from here starts to prove that, God, oh God, he is going to show harder to prove that he is good. Yes? And in that way, the more others devalue me, the more I teach the compressed energy to compensate through what? Through striving for superiority. So, I want to prove to you that I am not that destructive as you said to me from birth. I will now prove to you. Upon what will I prove on?
Since I was only taught to compare, I was told either you or Vacey Pupkin. Yes? If you are not going to be better than him, then you will be worse then you. There is no other alternative. That are you, you, irreplaceable and Vacey Pupkin is irreplaceable, will never be said by anyone because then we lose the way of controlling you, manipulate you such as like a horse. We need reins, so that you could be as a puppet on strings, of a sociam or a system, because we have been raised that way and were taught that and are passing that on to you. And tell you that if you are not going to strive to prove yourself, then you are going to be this worthless. So this feeling of inadequateness will always be exactly proportional to a feeling of excellence.

So if, I am feeling myself very, very, very worthless, like deeply compressed consciousness, then I will strive to come and raise above another that is exactly comparison proportional to that feelings of inadequateness because this is polarities. And polarities are a pendulum that again, is in a physical rule, and swing only based on that principal. So that is it, I end up in this scary, very, very scary trap of my own consciousness when there is no need for anyone to blackmail, manipulate me in that if, “You are not going to be this good, not going to be proven as standard of goodness, the kind that we forced you to be, then you will be bad.”
Then, I will myself, out of fear, will run to prove that I am good since I need, I was taught to compare, and in this way, judge myself as compared to someone else, then I will strive to be better than the other person. It will pleasure me that I am better than him, if I am will judge myself as worse than him, then I will hate that person and I will feel flawed in comparison to him, and so on. So in that sense, I will compare myself with someone and at the same time feel either pleasure and authority about it or feel worse and hate and despise, envy in the feeling of destruction.
It becomes as if I cannot love anything; all that used to be here when I was unjudged, that does not exist anymore, child does not remember who he was. Person deeply forgets, and this thin layer, horizontally, primitive consciousness that is in the trap that he ends up in, is the social life. This is all that exists in every unwarily conscious person.
So to be aware and remember who I am, you need to rise up and look above, above in that I am in a cage of that consciousness that I an inside of. And my consciousness is not just what I see from above, my thoughts are formed there and that I will consciously recognize in a one, two, will stop playing this game. My body, body as is also identifies with this broken consciousness, deformed. And that is why all broken connections, all of these cells is all of this sick body.
Well in order to born a new body, in a representation that is a new body that is vertically straight, this is for use for… So that vertically existed a body that is a healthy, happy, loving body, but not the one who had come from the very beginning to this very point, this was the level of animal’s consciousness, natural, when a person is just happy and himself shines outward energy, but does not realize that. In that way, this is not compare as the same as the spiritual awakened. This is a wonderful consciousness, free from pain, but it needs this layer in order to go through this layered, this pathway and come to this awareness.

In this way, the cycle is locked, this layer outlived itself. And this game of dualism, figuring out of where this ocean of pain is from; why inside, in my core, in full strength, this pain screams. I know why it screams. That’s it, in this awareness, I know and in this is now I need to start to rebuild all, all of my cells, these many walkable, old traditional, many years, yes, repeating youngster behavior models and scenarios that on a physical level, in clearly, clearly reproduces itself. The wondering thoughts that very strictly locked in these framed thoughts of comparison and judgement, I am not able to just jump here, just in one action that I want from what I want to see from above this deformed structure that forced, that created this pain and struggle. Well, this is the struggle that is in the chest of person’s heart chakra that is compressed.
I can’t jump out that quickly and say, I have accepted this decision to be aware and right now in this awareness, this will dissolve and will stop playing for me this role and become into an infinity sign because in this confliction between that I am destructive and importantly valued. And that this will no longer exist and this for me uselessly and senselessly because there is nothing and there is no one for me to prove because if I do not feel myself flawed, then there is no use to show my importance or significance.
This will be a lot deeper and a very hard work in the process to restructure the entire nervous system, and all consciousness that is created of the entire body because I cannot at all have any compete. Well, if truthfully to look from this level, then I simply cannot compete, even if I intentionally decide to simply change, in this simple, within this one inner movement just because I want to change it it’s impossible
because I am competing with everyone around, all the time, always, and with myself of yesterday’s. I compete with any of my friends and with my lover. I compete without interruption. My whole life, the processing of thought, of this primitive thinking, is conducted from competition.

Because comparison is competition. Comparison is imposition verdict, comparing is this strive for superiority and always achieving all of achieving goal this is pro-comparison. And in turn, deprives a person of love, infinite love because that is well, a person is not be able to love if he is comparing himself with someone and think that I am worthless or compare myself with someone else to think that the other person is worthless.
On some back scene, I will always do that. Even when I think that am in love, so, because I am in is higher intention doesn’t stand past that to love, well, like,… I want to love. Every particle strives for love and what else. What else can I do? I am frankly, this consciousness and no matter in what comparison. What else can I want in life other than to love? Why does it happen that I am feeling either worthless trash, or feeling myself superiority and from that I feel high from test authority over someone else, someone who is same as me. Because I do not know love to love, I forgot, but at this level I have never also disappeared from.
And in out next lessen, what to do next.

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